| so, new user name |
[26 Jul 2004|04:39pm] |
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hello kids. i was bored all day so i made a new livejournal. i realy hate this name so i figured id get a new one.
ADD THIS BITCH.
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=88.8) ___farewell
i must go allert some cummunities and such
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[24 Jul 2004|10:17pm] |
its so obvious that change has occured and it will never be the same. we have evolved into totally different people and nothing can ever change that. nothing can ever change what weve been through. were walked through the most false times in our lives, but we did it together. i think thats all that matters, we did it together. i just wanted you to fucking know that im not stupid and that i know were not the best of friends, but you shouldnt be stupid and assume that we arent friends at all. i have your back and i love you always and forever.
on another note the past two days have been weird.
-i was driving with jen and her mom in woonsocket yesterday after we got out of the whole bomb scare mess and i looked, just like i always do, at his house as we passed by. i didnt expect to see him, i never do. but i did. and i freaked out. jen wanted to see him so when i told her she made her mom turn around so she could get a look. CRAAAAP that sucked. hahah
-tonight i went to the movies with andrew and family. me and andrew saw i, robot. on the way out, we saw big joe. and he was with kelsey grady. she said hi very graciously. which is something i didnt expect. i felt bad because at first i forgot her name so i was just like "heeeey" and smiled. and then i thought after that i should have asked about her sister. even though she may hate me with all her guts, i think a bit differently. i am so bad at holding a grudge.
youve got to break your back to hold your ground and bones will heal so im standing strong. it hurts, its breaks, it kills, it takes... we'll fight, we'll win, we wont give in!
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[22 Jul 2004|06:26pm] |
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i havent had a real update like, all summer. my appologies, however, i do have a reason. my summer has been so efffing busy. i love it, but i dont have time to update as often. my days usually go as follows; wakre up, work for about 9 hours, come home, shower, leave3, come home around 11 or 12 and then go to bed. the cycle starts all over again.
work sucked for a while, but this week, andrew started working with us. it makes me so happy to be working. im getting payed to spend time with my boyfriend. its amazing. hes coming over in a bit. even though we were with each other all day haha. i love it.
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[19 Jul 2004|10:06pm] |
its been a year and an hour since i found out. and im crying the same tears i cried then. we lost someone way too early. nothing could ever explain losing such an amazing person so early. 4 months wasnt nearly enough time to say goodbye.
we love you TH.♥
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| fucking christ. |
[16 Jul 2004|01:47pm] |
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it happens more than once a day now that i get a knot in my stomache the size of fucking utah. someone mentions the slight thing and i can feel my insides tighten up, and my eyes begin to water. I. FUCKING. SUCK. i keep thinking there has to be a reason for it, but i honestly cant see it.
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[09 Jul 2004|11:49pm] |
DOUBT FUCKING SUCKS. i hate it. and it screws things up.
i think about something way too much and then screw it over entirely
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[07 Jul 2004|04:31pm] |
today fucking sucked.
i havent cried so much in year, since my aunt passed away.
my head hurts so bad and my vision is insanely blurry.
im incredibly pissed at my sister, and im not talking to her for a while after tonight.
someone come give me the best hug theyve got, i need it.
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[06 Jul 2004|06:02pm] |
Thirteen random things you like (no order):
1. shows
2. andrew
3. holding hands
4. livejournal
5. laughing
6. purevolume.com
7. sailing
8. shopping
9. cuddling
10.hairspray and mr redken
11.vibes
12.bandannas
13.instant messenger
Twelve movies:
1. chocolat
2. elephant
3. donnie darko
4. dodge ball
5. a clockwork orange
6. the labyrinth
7. blow
8. wonderland
9. kill bill
10.sweet november
11.requiem for a dream
12.one hour photo
Eleven good bands/artists:
1. as i lay dying
2. anterrabae
3. the acacia strain
4. underoath
5. jeff buckley
6. glass jaw
7. everytime i die
8. from autumn to ashes
9. remembering never
10.nora
11. bury your dead
Ten things about you ... physically:
1. brown eyes
2. short hair
3. flippy hair
4. bown hair
5. 5 foot 3 inches
6. freckle in the middle of my nose
7. tiny feet
8. no butt
9. plugs
10. crooked teeth
Nine good friends:
1. andrew
2. pat
3. sammie
4. cait
5. jen
6. ashley!<3
7. john
8. caroline
9. bob
Eight Favorite Foods/Drinks:
1. ice tea
2. salad
3. pasta
4. pears
5. gingerale!
6. mashed potatos
7. half baked
8. oreos
Seven things you wear daily:
1. sauconys
2. pants
3. bandanna
4. plugs
5. belt
6. shirt
7. undies
Six things that annoy you:
1. scabs on my hair
2. when my hair gets gross
3. muscle aches
4. babysitting
5. throath aches
7. the white sour bears.
Five things you touch everyday:
1. hairspray
2. cell phone
3. feet
4. stereo
5. computer
Four shows you watch:
1. mad tv
2. comedy central stand up
3. degrassi
4. the news
Two people on lj that you have kissed:
fgjhfg this is hard
1. sammie hah
2. and uh... JS... and not you jess stevens ;-)
One person you could spend the rest of your life with:
1. peter kowalsky
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| you know that id embrace you but i was too ashamed to face you saying welcome home |
[05 Jul 2004|11:35pm] |
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i got the worst memory thing today. all i could think about was sitting in the park in england with all the cool kids, patty, mel, mandamito and jess and eating like 43597 twist bars. those things were so good. i fucking miss london.
anyway, ive been babysitting since saturday morning and it kinda makes me wanna shoot myself in the head. but jens been keeping me company. and sometimes my parents are nice enough to let me get awau for a bit. i got to see andrew for a while on saturday and then last night i went with jen ash john and jessie to fireworks and minigolf. we saw alot of people and they were all mad because i didnt have andrew come. I TRIED, I REALY DID! but he went out with his family.
jen just wiped haf baked ice cream all over my face. im sticky. and shes trying to feed me now. im so sick of food. heedfngtbsk;ebsrg. im sick of food and babies.
someone needs to voulenteer there services soon, because i need help moving to my new bedroom. and im lazy and i dont wanna do it alone. infact i want other people to do it for me.
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| and the blood from your nose matches your lipstick shade |
[03 Jul 2004|02:38pm] |
so, the past few days ive been thinking alot and i think thats a bad thing. when i think about one thing for too long i come up with the most rediculous reasons for why something happens. and then i get all paranoid. and it gets bad.
all that aside, yesterday was friday which means today is saturday which means i have 4 days off. YEAH TOO FUCKING BAD I HAVE TO BABYSIT.
last night i went out with andrew. we went to belilngham and ate at the healthfood store becausde they have amazing food. and then we spent about a half hour in newburry comics. i got the new ALEXISONFIRE CD. someone who has it, listen to track 6 and tell me that it does not sound a whole ton like POD well, yeah i think it does. so im pissed i spent the money. oh and i got new plugs. pretty cool. andrew got two cds. WE SAW ASHLEY AND JEWLS AND THE GROSS ONE [little anthony]. i was so excited to see ash, its been so freaking long... i came out of the ladies room and was andrew to come out and i saw her and sprinted away from andrew to ashley. i felt bad about that though.
yeah then me and him visited his memere [sp?]... shes such a nice lady. and then we came here and fell asleep untill about 11. he went home =(... its always sad when he leaves. ♥
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| acdc owns my theme song. |
[29 Jun 2004|05:35pm] |
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mood |
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 excited |
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its been a while, so theres lots to say, so ill only go over the important stuff.
saturday i went to a show. bury your dead, the acacia strain, the breathing process, hostage heart and what weapons bring war. drove there with patty jen bobby and kel. met andrew there and he was with kevin and jeff. show was alot of fun. i was angry alot though... it was one of those nights where you have one of those painful realizations... jen slept over afterwards.
sunday i hung around with jen. then went to sammies. with cait and sam. it was a ton of fun. i missed them so much. <3 love you guys!
monday i stayed home from work!!! woo. i came home from the willis residence around 2. i then went to andrews and we went for a walk in the woods and hung out and stuff. ate dinner with his family and his brothers friend. and then we went to get movies, we got ELEPHANT. agh, it was so good, very realistic and the script was amazing. it was good because it wasnt anything to fake or complicated for a regular highschool. that night was amazing, wasnt it gregory? barbra<3syou!
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[25 Jun 2004|09:59pm] |
Open wounds
can always heal
by killing all I ever feel
click the hammer and let it go
jagged pieces of shattered hope
you call it love
you call it love
tear it free and pour me out.
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[22 Jun 2004|11:03pm] |
okay so the past two days have been a wicked good start to summer
yesterday
+++++school ended! i faild physics exam though
+jen and i came home and watched monster
+made BULLETFACE GRACE
---babysat for an hour
++++++went to the mall and target with peter and jen and my sister. the most fun ive ad in a while. haha, HEY JHAQUISE!!!
+got a bathing suit
+hung at my house with peter and jen
+hung at peters house, but his pool was closed
+slept on jens trampoline because her house smelled like skunk.
today
not AS great overall, but there were a few amazing hours.\
-went to the dentist
-worked all day, but made mad dough.
++++++++++++hung with andrew for a few hours.
i am working so much this summer. but only because i might buy my neighbors old dodge dart. its so hot.... and im working tomorrow too, so goodnight.
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[18 Jun 2004|02:43pm] |
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mood |
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 crappy |
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yesterday was alright. three months for me and andrew! that boys is so amazing. i like him alot. too bad i only saw him when we were walking in to the school. :o(... tonight is my last chance to see him and then i probly wont even talk to him for like two days. boo.. but anyway, i had my english and history exams. sucky like whoa. i def failed history but i think i did good on english.
came home and little miss jen came over. and we tanned. haha, well i tanned, she just sat in the sun and got realy hot. my tummy got tan :o)... we ordered food. then bobby called and told us to go see new found glory with him. okay, so we did. we had nothing else to do and it was free. we got into providizzy around 530. we missed one band but whatev... we saw Living End. even though i wouldnt go out of my way to see them or even listen to them, i must admit they were pretty good. they had a few good little jams. and then new found glory set up. hahahah... i was obsessed with new found glory for about two years... but i completely lost my taste for them last year... but i still knew every song, well all of them except for the new stuff. haha, i still dont like them. it was still a good time though. there were so many drugs, and so many wicked pissed city security guys. i laughed a good share.
i missed the first marching band practice though! im so freakin' pissed.
today sucked. more exams. mom got me subway... i saw nick brannigan, twice actually. it was weird. at first i wasnt sure if it was him so i didnt bother saying hello. i saw him at the middle school asnd then at subway. odd. i came home watched kill bill and fell asleep. and now i have nothing to do with myself... however i did just find the most amazing curtains hanging in my cellar. im forgetting about the fact that they are probly 50 years old, because they are blue with white polka dots... woo.
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[16 Jun 2004|09:27pm] |
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mood |
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 annoyed |
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MODULATE ME. ITS ALL SO TYPICAL. EXCITE ME. SWITCH UP THE PROTOCALL.
im insanely frustrated with school right now. its a good thing we have only 10 hours and 15 minutes left.
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[13 Jun 2004|10:46am] |
alrizzy, so yesterday was pretty cool. i got my hair cut in the morning and im not realy sure if i like it yet, its very short and she cut off all my bangs. and i HATE having short bangs. its above my eye brows and it sucks cock. big cock. i want them back. because honestly i would love the style if i DIDNT LOOK LIKE A FUCKING DIKE. :-(
anyway, after that i came home, hung with my Mimi and then went out to eat with my mom dad and Mimi. came home and then went to mandas graduation party.
it was pretty fun, lots of cool people. especially andrew! that boy is awesome.. he makes me so happy. cept i felt realy bad because i forced hom top ask his parents if he could sleepover with everyone else, and then he got yelled at. i hate it when hes upset... its so sad. aw man, i miss him. and he better be abe to come over tonight.
meh, im gonna go shower, do my lesbian hair and then start writing history crap.
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